There are many different kinds of reasons for men to have affairs. Forces such as sexual attraction, companionship, excitement and curiosity can pull men toward affairs. Affairs are often glamorized in movies, romance novels, soap operas, and TV shows. Public disclosure of public figures having affairs is headline news because people are fascinated and titillated by hearing about others’ affairs. Men are bombarded with images of women as sex objects in advertising and marketing campaigns. Over and over, the message to men is that the good life includes a procession of sexy women in their lives. Women inadvertently buy into this image and struggle to achieve it. The lack of good sex education and the existence of sexual taboos combine to make it difficult to talk honestly about sex.
Truly speaking, women seem to be better cheaters than men: they are better at keeping their affairs under wraps and generally have an agenda for their infidelity. Some affairs occur because the cheating parties truly want to leave their established partner, particularly when they are married. However, very few married men leave their wife for their mistress! That is, unless their wife finds out and leaves. The Bureau of Justice Statistics states that on an average, there are more than three women who gets murdered by their husbands or boyfriends every day. If your partner is not willing to seek help for his abusive behavior, your only option is to leave or get divorced.
According to a poll of over 400 women conducted by WomanSavers.com, love and intimacy is the number one reason why women have affairs, followed by sex, money and finally excitement. The differences in why women and men have affairs are varied with women seeking emotional fulfillment and most men seeking sexual fulfillment.
The top 10 reasons why men have affairs include:
1. More sex (sometimes due to lack of sex in their relationship)
2. Sexual variety through different partners or different sexual experiences
3. Too boost their ego to feel special or still attractive to the opposite sex
4. For the thrill of the chase
5. Opportunistic sex (if the opportunity occurs, they can’t pass it up)
6. To sabotage their current relationship
7. Revenge (to get back at their partner for one reason or another)
8. A feeling of entitlement (the belief they are entitled because they work hard or are the bread winner)
9. Sexual addiction
There is no such thing as a perfect affair. Keeping an on-going affair is a juggling act of covering up lies, explaining time away, and dealing with associated guilt feelings. The cheater becomes consumed by guilt and sometimes lashes out even more at their partner. If you are involved in an affair, respect yourself and your partner enough to get out.